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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
A woman goes to the Doctor, with bruises
on her face.

The Doctor asks: "What happened?"

The woman says: "Doctor, I don't know what to do. Every time my

husband comes home drunk, he slaps me around."

The Doctor says: "I have a real good cure for that. When your

husband comes home drunk, just take a glass of water and start

swishing it in your mouth. Just swish and swish but don't swallow it

until he goes to bed and is asleep."

Two weeks later the woman comes back to the doctor looking fresh

and reborn.

The woman says: "Doctor that was a brilliant idea! Every time my

husband came home drunk, I swished with water. I swished and

swished, and he didn't touch me! How does the water do that?"

The Doctor says: "The water does f**k all""¦it's keeping your mouth

shut that does the trick...."

News item

hhAfter having dug to a depth of 10 feet last year, British scientists

traces of copper wire dating back 200 years and came to the conclusion that

their ancestors already had a telephone network more than 150 years ago.

Not to be outdone by the Brits, in the weeks that followed, an American

archaeologist dug to a depth of 20 feet, and shortly after, a story

published in the New York Times: "American archaeologists, finding traces

250-year-old copper wire, have concluded that their ancestors already had an

advanced high-tech communications network 100 years earlier than the


One week later, the Irish Department of Agriculture reported the following:

"After digging as deep as 30 feet near Ballyhaunis, Co Mayo, Mick

a self-taught archaeologist, reported that he found absolutely f*ck all.

Mick has therefore concluded that 250 years ago,
Ireland had already gone


It makes you fierce proud to be Irish.
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